be Michael Burry
>born 1971 in San Jose, CA
>age 2, get eye cancer, lose the whole thing
>rock a glass eye
>have no depth perception but still play football
>high school: Santa Teresa, ace everything, zero friends (for the character arc)
1990s:
>UCLA econ + pre-med
>obsessed with stocks
>start posting value picks on obscure forums
>become message board mod
>get noticed by Vanguard and Joel Greenblatt
>start a fund
1997:
>Vanderbilt med school
>MD achievement unlocked
>Work as a doctor while moonlighting as “Dr. Doom” on stock forums
>Stanford residency in neurology
> gets bored of med
>quit med career
>take entire inheritance + family loans and launch Scion Capital
2000-2007
>Scion returns 489% crushing $spy
>spot housing bubble before everyone else
>beg banks for credit default swaps on subprime mortgages
>"Uh, we want to bet the house burns down?" Banks: "Lmao sure, weirdo"
>investors riot: "You're insane, gimme my money!"
>raise gates in a side pocket so they can’t withdraw funds
2008:
>Market melts down, swaps pay out
>bag $100M personally, $700M for LPs
>Wall Street: "How tf did he know?"
>Feds + SEC up his ass
>close Scion, return capital (sick of the assholes)
2010:
>gets a book written about him
> "The Big Short" movie gets made
>Christian Bale plays you as autistic drum-banging 300IQ spastic
>Overnight fame
>Relaunch as Scion Asset Management, focus water/gold/farmland
>portfolio hits $100M+ by 2016
2025:
>become active on Twitter
>publicly short $nvda
>make 20% within 3 weeks
>Shut down Scion
>Start Substack newsletter
>Generate $10 million+ run rate revenue on day 1 for sharing shitposts
When I was in the Navy, met a marine on deployment. First port call was a month into deployment in Hong Kong. He bought a McDonalds burger there, left it on top of some pipe work in the berthing. Fast forward 6 months and we are about to pull into San Diego. Fucker eats it. Never made him sick. He said it just tasted like a cold 3 hour old McDonalds cheese burger.